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I want to travel back in time to the early dynasties. Like Brooke has taken Sarawak, i want to conquer a mass of land…
and as a cruel joke, make the inhabitants learn the ‘G’ language.. or pig latin as the official language. A hundred years later when all is educated and civilised, they’ve realised that i’ve taken them for a ride.
On my magnificent tombstone of the great conquerer, an elaborate design carved with prayers and my name.. and underneath it all, when translated from G, reads “You fell for it, lolololololololol!!”
I’ve always wanted to drop down to the grass, kiss it and roll around it. Letting it all lose with feelings of happiness, etc, and all that shit, maybe from the feeling of falling in love. whatever.
So yesterday god granted that wish but it wasn’t how i pictured it to be.
So there i was, walking towards uni.. along the pathway next to the the village green. Beside the pathway, the land sloped down to a moist green field, which reflected the rays of the setting sun.
And there was, an attractive girl, elle a saisi mon coeur!, walking towards me heading in the opposite direction, not too far away. She caught me staring and i panicked.
I wandered in awe and lost concentration, so much that i didn’t realise that half my foot was in a pothole. I lost balance and i fell awkwardly. It wasn’t a proper fall even.. it was one of those falls where you go, “uh-oh uh-oh, i think i am falling, i’m going down..i’m going down slowly. ha-ha, excuse me, i think i will fall slowly”
As if that wasn’t embarrassing enough, conditions were perfect for the consequence to escalate. It was like getting caught walking around campus with a piece of macaroni pasta on your shirt and accidentally snorting when you laugh to brush it away, only to cough heavily because you choked on your own saliva before you can defend yourself from the barrage of laughters. The awkward fall, the pot hole, the slippery path way, the small slope downwards and the wet grass. It was all there, had these things be ingredients of some sort, the witch of oz would be delighted that it all came together perfectly.
and so it happened, once i hit the ground, i slipped even further (who slips again while they’re lying ground anyway? Genius joke, god. Genius) and i rolled my ass down the slope. Any smart or sane person would’ve made a decent effort to stop rolling and stand up. But i was neither that time, it was 100% pure idiot rolling down the small hill and i continued to roll down the gently-slopping hill, until the fence stopped this momentum of ridicule. I didn’t need to wonder what wet grass tasted like, i was living the dream, baby. but as far as i was concerned, i was chowing on the grass like a cow on LSD.
A Passer-by looked at me in a curious way. Half curious, half amused actually. and who wouldn’t? From the distance, the whole scene would’ve looked like i decided to kneel down and said ” Well, it’s a nice wet day, i think i’ll have a jolly good roll down this hill before my class. Tra-la-la-la”
Then comes along, several people, asking the question we all expect, with half-assed sincerity, “Are you alright?”
But you know that what they really wanted to ask was, “What the fuck are you doing?”
What am i doing? I was just expressing my life through an expressive contemporary dance. Wonder and adore my grass coated costume! I hope you aaaaallll enjoyed my performance. Allow me to waltz my way out of here gracefully. ’till then, danke und auf wiedersehen, leuter!
Ironically, i was wearing dirt brown that time, the grass matched perfectly with my attire. Maybe, it was a good day to roll down.
Summary:
I didn’t mind threadless charging me an extra US$3 for their t shirts
but when i received a new shipment of threadless tees, you can tell that the tshirts feel somewhat lighter. When i wore it, its thinner and the tees are low quality shit. Decided to do a bit of stretch test and surely enough, heard a small rip (just the threads loosing up due to shit stitching) and the tees stretched really easily.
What happened to the American Apparel tees?
fark. why, threadless, why?
I freaking hate these kind of questions in IQ test..
Look at any IQ tests and you’re bound to see that question but with different stupid names like yonks, yanks, clinks, bitches, hos. Those stupid names annoy me.
The two language that i really want to learn (like, really) would have to be Arabic and Tamil. So i thought, heck, i have a lot of time at the moment, so might as well have a kick start lesson in tamil. Learn a few phrases and maybe strike up a conversation with the indians around my school.
So i came across this site which gives common phrases (stupid me, it’s hindi actually) but one caught my attention..
http://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hindi.php
LOL
BWEEEKK, taste like shit and the dude tells me that this is the best testing one. This thing tastes like cardboard man… liquified cardboard.
No wonder people loose weight over these things cause all the body wants to do now is to CRAP IT OUT.
For those of you who are wondering why i bought protein shakes, let me explain. I eat 3 meals a day and i spend most of my time awake in front of the computer doing work. In most of the time, i find myself extremely weak. Unless running can churn me complex diffusitivity equations and permeability correlations, DON’T yap me bout it because with the deadlines i’m ramming into, i don’t have time. So i went to GNC and ask them if i could get any supplements (pills) to boost up my energy. What i got instead was a complete change of a diet plan and filler meals would be supplemented by the shakes. That’s it.
oh.. and i bought new shoes (YES, I’M A WHORE)
I was at the supermarket the other day and decided to get me self some good ‘ol pringles. Fortunately for me, pringles now come in a larger size, for the same price. Now, Pringles come in the ‘Party pack’ with 35% more chips.
Then, for some reason, it got me thinking about a lot of things… which wasted a lot of my time. First of all, why do they call it a ‘party pack’ if it’s got 35% more chips? Is it assuming that with 35% more chips in my pringle packet, i’d be more compelled to throw a party?
What constitutes a ‘party pack’. Does the extra 35% satisfy the demand for my party guests as oppose to if i only have the normal pack? What would happen if i bought the normal pack, how much of a shortage would i face for my party.
But then again, supposedly if i were to serve pringles on my party, i wouldn’t buy one packet of pringles whether it’s party pack or not.. i’d buy at least 4-5! Why won’t they make one super ass long pringle package thats got 400% more pringles and call that a party pack?Heck, why call it a party pack, why not a ‘Jumbo pack’.
Why not just call the pringles with 35% extra chips ‘happy pack’. Because that’s true, i’d be happy to receive 35% more chips for free but i certainly would not be compelled to share it, let alone throw a party over it…
someone kill me..
Oh great… i forgot to buy the bread…
I was checking out the picture gallery for my phone. It surprises me how long i haven’t cleaned it up and transfer it to my computer (since i bought it 2 years ago). It does bring priceless memories, albeit how crap the quality of pictures are. So i’m just sharing around.
Picture one (taken Oct ‘06), Sydney sunsets are extremely beautiful and the balcony from my apartment provides first class seats.
This picture at Centennial Park was taken just a day before i headed home for Brunei for the 2006 Summer holidays. These ducks were awesome and are the reason why i’m considering having one as a pet. It’s a pity why i haven’t been to the park since, even though it’s just 15 minutes away.
This was an interesting time in Starbucks
Cashier: “Sir, your name?”
me: “Airul”
Cashier: “I rule?”
me: “Airul…”
Cashier: “I rule.. er.. oookay..” (obviously thinking i’m some sort of a cock)
me: “Bob… my name is Bob…”
minutes later…
Barrista: “Hi, here’s your latte KELVIN”
Taken September 2007. 128 minutes was my official time for the 14km City2Surf run. Over 60000 people ran, and i’m number 30305, i’m not even an athletic person. Not bad considering i was down for a good 15 minutes from cramps. I cried my ass off in my last kilometre, what an emotional run cause i never thought i could finish.
Ermm.. ok. This has got to be the gayest tray of eggs i’ve ever seen.
There are heaps more photos, ill show them soon.
He’s on a killing spree and he shouts “GAAARBAGE DAY!” ?? Whaaaaaa??
LOL LOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOL I’m laughing so hard at the moment
I’ll post up rants and opinions soon but i just wanna share these videos with you guys. I can safely deduce that Thais makes the best damn commercials in the planet.
These videos are short, so even espeed users will be able to watch it. The one below is just ONE of the many that could be found in youtube but this one cracks me up badly
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